Today's Important News

Post » Sun May 13, 2012 8:16 am

‘IS A NEW VIDEOGAME PERHAPS GOING TO BE RELEASED AT SOME POINT IN THE FUTURE?’



‘A NEW VIDEOGAME WILL CONTAIN SOME SORT OF COPY PROTECTION SYSTEM.’



‘A VIDEOGAME DEVELOPER HAS SUGGESTED THAT ONE GAMES CONSOLE MIGHT BE EVER SO SLIGHTLY PREFERABLE TO ANOTHER ONE.’



‘SEQUEL TO A BELOVED VIDEOGAME IS A BIT DIFFERENT.’



‘”SOME SORT OF TECHNOLOGY IS ‘THE FUTURE’”, SAYS MAN.’



‘”VIDEOGAMES ARE BAD”, SAYS AN ‘EXPERT’ WHO DOESN’T PLAY GAMES BUT WAS ASKED ABOUT THEM BY AN EXPLOITATIVE IDIOT WITH AN AGENDA.’



‘”OOH THIS OTHER VIDEOGAMES COMPANY ISN’T ALL THAT NICE”‘ SAYS A MAN FROM A DIFFERENT VIDEOGAMES COMPANY ALTOGETHER.’



‘NEW CONSOLE WILL HAVE SOME SORT OF PERCENTAGE MORE POWER THAN A CONSOLE YOU ALREADY OWN.’
‘ENORMOUSLY SUCCESSFUL VIDEOGAME “MIGHT” SEE A SEQUEL, IMPLIES BUSINESS ENTITY BEHIND IT.’



‘”ANNOUNCEMENT: WE WILL BE ANNOUNCING SOMETHING SOON”‘ ANNOUNCES ANNOUNCEMENT DIVISION OF VIDEOGAMES COMPANY.



‘”OUR NEW GAME WHICH WE ARE TRYING TO MAKE LOTS OF PEOPLE BUY WILL BE A QUANTUM LEAP IN VISCERAL ACTION”‘ SAYS MARKETING SPOKESPERSON.’



‘BE HERE AT 5PM FOR WHEN A BARRAGE OF ADVERTISING COMMENCES WITH A 1M 12 SECOND VIDEO OF LOGOS AND A MAN WITH A DEEP VOICE SAYING SOMETHING ABOUT WAR.’



‘”WE PERHAPS MAYBE SORT OF DIDN’T REALLY TOTALLY DO WHAT WE WOULD POSSIBLY LIKE TO HAVE IDEALLY DONE WITH THE LAST GAME BUT WILL DEFINITELY ABSOLUTELY DO X100 WITH THIS NEW GAME THAT IS ON SALE SOON’” ADMITS A MAN WHO MAKES VIDEOGAMES.








Brought to you by the ever amusing http://www.rockpapershotgun.com/2012/02/14/todays-important-news! (click for full article) :tongue:

^ Translation: I stole this from Rock Paper Shotgun


I thought it would be nice to get a little comic relief from our boring everyday life. So go on, make up your own big, important gaming news, without spamming of course, and try to have fun for once here on the forums :tongue:
User avatar
SexyPimpAss
 
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Post » Sun May 13, 2012 8:03 am

Wow, this all sounds great. I, the consumer, am going to buy everyone's product / be influenced not to buy the competitor's product / not think for myself!

Thank you, news, for keeping me uninformed but giving me the illusion that I am!
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Tamara Primo
 
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Joined: Fri Jul 28, 2006 7:15 am

Post » Sun May 13, 2012 1:55 pm

BETHESDA ARE DEVELOPING AN RPG ON THE LIFE OF A PANDA
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Ownie Zuliana
 
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Joined: Thu Jun 15, 2006 4:31 am

Post » Sun May 13, 2012 10:20 pm

The comments under that article are hilarious.

"Peter Molyneux ! I know it’s you !"

Oh, also:

VIDEO GAME DEVELOPER/JOURNALIST TELLS/SHOWS HOW FAR FRANCHISE X HAS COME IN W YEARS. NOW YOU CAN SEE FRANCHISE X DO Y IN Z PIXELS/RESOLUTION/STUFF.
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Music Show
 
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Post » Sun May 13, 2012 9:49 pm

BETHESDA ARE DEVELOPING AN RPG ON THE LIFE OF A PANDA

And in celebration, they are releasing a http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FzRH3iTQPrk DLC for Skyrim!
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James Wilson
 
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Post » Sun May 13, 2012 6:14 pm

What's going on?
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Rob
 
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Joined: Fri Jul 13, 2007 12:26 am

Post » Sun May 13, 2012 6:34 pm

What's going on?

Beats me. :confused:
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mike
 
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Joined: Fri Jul 27, 2007 6:51 pm

Post » Sun May 13, 2012 3:12 pm

And in celebration, they are releasing a http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FzRH3iTQPrk DLC for Skyrim!
Bethesda have also realesed a http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_YZA3sGk36A of what else is to come.
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Betsy Humpledink
 
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Joined: Wed Jun 28, 2006 11:56 am

Post » Sun May 13, 2012 8:11 am

THIS JUST IN: VIDEOGAMES MAKE YOU VIOLENT ACCORDING TO EVIDENCE BEREFT SCIENTIST.
And the Daily Mail version:
FACT: VIDEO GAMES CAN CAUSE CANCER!
(followed two days later by)
FACT: VIDEO GAMES COULD CURE CANCER!
(followed two days later still with)
FOREIGN (AND BROWN!) TERRORISTS PREPARE FOR ATTACK ON SUBURBIA WITH EVIL VIDEO GAMES YOUR CHILDREN ARE PLAYING!
The Daily Express version naturally being:
PRINCESS DI’S DRIVER OF DEATH IS SECRET GRAND THEFT AUTO ADDICT
That's comedy gold. :lol:
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Marnesia Steele
 
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Post » Sun May 13, 2012 4:42 pm

‘IS A NEW VIDEOGAME PERHAPS GOING TO BE RELEASED AT SOME POINT IN THE FUTURE?’
HL3?
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Jynx Anthropic
 
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