Dear sir, ma'am, or Argonian mid-way through the change between life phases,
We are contacting you to ask for your assistance reguarding a small matter of security. Years ago an all powerful mask was sealed under a Nordic shrine for safe keeping. Unfortunately to open this account of storage we require eight (8) masks of awesome power. If you send them our way along with a description of what kind of lock you have to your home via secure courier we shall be able to unlock this tomb and acquire the mask of incredible awesomeness. In return you will receive two (2) plains of Oblivion, and one (1) Region of Tamriel (of your choosing) once we have conquered Nirn.
Sincerly, M'aiq the Liar
P.S: While there are many letters in circulation asking you to abandon your valuables to other Khajiit in favour of great rewards, this plea is authentic and is not an attempt to rob you of your goods and treasures.