A theory on why we can traverse the Nchardak Ruins.

Post » Mon Dec 10, 2012 9:30 pm

Now I know that the Nchardak ruins were once submerged in water, because it was the last resort of trying to keep the Nords from taking it over. However, we do not know of how that water was freed from the facility and how we are able to traverse these ruins without being an Argonian or having some kind of spell or potion to keep us from drowning.

Now I present to you a theory. Now imagine, if you will, that Akatosh was coming from his buddies Talo's party. Stendar and Arkay go him wasted by doing belly shots and he really needed to pee. And Dibella, being a wonderful goddess of love that she is, was screwing Julianos because he found out a new spell to make his member twice his size. Now he went over Zenithar's place, but he was out, washing the hobo's dirty laundry, because he is a very nice fellow. After a few seconds of banging on his door, he thought that he could hold it because Mara's house is just down the lane, and she wouldn't mind letting Akatosh use the restroom. So the Dragon God of Time was waddling down the street, drunk and with a full bladder, and accidentally saw a sight he shouldn't have seen. Mara and Kynareth were making passionate lisbian Aedric love on their couch. Now Akatosh's mind said no, but his [censored] said yes, so he just could not leave. So Akatosh got a boner from watching the two goddesses make love until Mara saw him peeping through the window. So he ran away, while was laughing at him. struggling to keep his urine from leaking onto his new American Eagle jeans. At one point the god just said screw it, and took it out and just pissed on everything. Now contrary to humans, Aedras pee out anti-water (which cancel out water, hence the 'anti' to the anti-water.) He could not aim with his rock hard boner and got anti-water all over the universe and a drop landed on the ruins and that is why we could walk on these ruins to this day.
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Laura Elizabeth
 
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Post » Mon Dec 10, 2012 6:19 am

Best lore explanation ever! +1
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Ross Thomas
 
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Post » Mon Dec 10, 2012 4:46 pm

Oh my...
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Shaylee Shaw
 
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Post » Mon Dec 10, 2012 3:35 pm

wtf did I just read? :0
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Soraya Davy
 
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Post » Mon Dec 10, 2012 4:42 pm

Oooook.
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Laura Richards
 
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Post » Mon Dec 10, 2012 7:22 pm

wtf did I just read? :0

Thats what im wondering! But entertaining none the less, they should write this into the game :D
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Jack Moves
 
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Post » Mon Dec 10, 2012 11:30 am

I just laughed so hard from this that I woke up my roommate. Best lore ever.
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Kelli Wolfe
 
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Post » Mon Dec 10, 2012 6:18 pm

Thus the origin of the http://www.imperial-library.info/sites/default/files/dogate_til_fishystick.jpg
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Rozlyn Robinson
 
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Post » Mon Dec 10, 2012 6:02 pm

Mara and kynereth, Merlins beard yes!!!
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Etta Hargrave
 
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