The Falkreath guards sometimes say ''Just my luck, stuck in the sticks with this crazy old woman''

I assume ''the sticks'' is slang for the forest, but who is the crazy old woman?

His mother, isn't it?

Never heard them say it before, and unless the Guards all have the same mother, I do not know ._.

I've heard that more than once, and it always makes me scratch my head. I wish you could ask the guard who he's talking about, but you can't. Might be a leftover vestige of some planned quest that never got included, who knows?

The sticks is the countryside, more often than not very isolated. I have absolutely no idea who the old woman is though. Like the others I've never heard them say that line.

Yes, I wondering too.
Try read Lumberjack's Wife and Cabin in the Woods.
It took place in Falkreath, perhaps "that woman"?

To me it has always sounded like an improperly assigned line, to my knowledge there are no crazy old women in Falkreath. Looks like it was made for some specific guard [supposed to take care of someone like Anise perhaps?] and somehow found its way into the generic guards dialogue.

Just some guy who wishes he was single again back in Cyrodill living the bachelor life.

Okay this is sounds reasonable for me.

All of the guards are twins. Similar to the Nurse Joy's and Officer Jenny's of Pokemon. They once were an army. Until the Thalmor found them and shot arrow's in their knees. They became the guards of Skyrim.

I have only seen this one in Morthal, and assumed he was talking about being stuck in the swamps with the crazy old female Jarl. I forget her name, but the whole family is a bit odd due to their visions.