without giving away story line...just wondering if there anything in the game..like quests for another faction or something, that would prevent me from buying the house in solitude?

do I have to join the imperial legion?

I dunno but I cant get the guy to go talk to the jarl so i can get the quest from the other guy lol

Finish up any uncompleted misc quests you might have - and particularly any quests you might have that were assigned by another Jarl regardless of whether they are miscelanious or not. Some favor quests or similarly structured quests (such as some thane quests) use shared quest IDs/scripts and so sometimes you can't have multiple versions of them offered simultaneously.

A scene has to play out there for it to trigger the quests the court gives you as well. Try to get there around 2 pm or so. Also, go somewhere and wait for 24 hours - note what time the day changes. If it does not change somewhere close to midnight this might be your issue as it can mess up NPC scheduling. If your day-change and clock are out of sync and you're on the PC, let us know and we can tell you a quick and painless way to fix it.

Also, try doing a few favors for people in Solitude - that usually helps for me.

thanks! Ill give that a try..I'm on PS3 (shouldda mentioned that lol)