I all ready have and use two Shouts unrelenting force and the wirlwind one
i have like 3 others but are not " activated" or what ever is call that.
i have kill like 5 dragons since i received the last shout but two of the words of the wirlwind dont work or are not "activated".
Of the other 3 shouts, should i go to the gray beards or something?
or is like killing the right dragon for the right word?

You need to activate the shouts using the Dragon souls you've collected before you are allowed to use them.

On the PC, highlight the shout then press R to use the soul on that shout, you need to do that for each level of the shout available so I full three word shout will use three souls.

on ps3 you have to go to 'shout screen', choose the unhighlighted shout and press square button. it tells you on bottom right hand of 'shout' screen how many dragon souls that you have

I did the same thing with my first like 3-4 shouts. I kept thinking that I just needed to pregress in the main story more to use them..... then I saw the nice little option at th bottom right that says "Unlock Shout".

Don't feel bad if you facepalm.... I did too..

Psht, only the Dragonborn would make that kind of mistake.

Ohwait.