To you Forum Trolls who are so far above the rest of us noobalicious help-seekers - get a life. I simply asked a very prevalent question regarding a broken quest - this was NOT a spoiler - go bring momma her cookies and save your wit for your blow-up dolls

No lollygagging!

Seriously though, I got lucky on one character where I repeatedly when to Windhelm, Whiterun and Markarth to buy some ingots for crafting and I luckily over heard a guard saying something about a murder on a return trip to Windhelm.
From there I went to the grave yard area and followed most of the advice on the UESP page for this quest. I was able to complete it and get the amulet. joben1 already linked earlier to what info I used.
So the key for you seems to be getting that scene in the graveyard. Which seems connected to the calendar day and week. There have been a few threads mentioning that there is a bug with how the caledar flows, so it could be a luck of the draw to get that scene to start I'm afraid.