So I killed the orphanage hag lady cuz she beat the kids, then I killed the hooded guy who aside he defiled daughters cuz that sounded like [censored]. Then I went to the cave to get my free light stealth armor and then turn on them and kill them later, not taking any hits on people well guards want to kill me or jail me now. How'd they know? Cuz I killed the hag in front of the kids? Am I gonna have to go back to a saved state to undo this? Is it just cuz I started the dark brotherhood quest line? I want the stealth robes still without guards after me. I'm playing essentially good. Thanks

You need to reload to a save just after you kill Grelod the Kind. This time when you get kidnapped, you need to kill Astrid (the icky chick in the icky armor, sitting on the top of the bookcase when you wake up). Then follow the quest prompts to wipe the DB. You'll get the armor when you follow the "Kill the DB" questline.

Follow what she said (I tried to get a 'thats what she said joke' except it would be literal, not figurative, but I couldnt think of any

Don't forget to use dead thrall on Astrid, and take her home...

Eww. *shudder*

What's wrong with having the Dark Brotherhood as decorations?

It's as close as one can get to taxidermy.

I'll take the animal heads I've used the rest of as food and leather thanks.

Your loss, but they are a bit hard to pose, however...

The family members are by default essential and remain so if you choose not to destroy them. By choosing not to kill Astrid in your first meeting, you've told the game that you might join the Brotherhood, and so it's waiitng for you to progress.

If you were to kill Astrid, shrouded armor can be taken from her body, and shrouded robes can be found on Festus Krex, Gabriella, and sitting on a shelf by the entrance.

If the guards are after you, you have a bounty from somewhere, or are a vampire. They don't automatically become agreesive for joining the Brotherhood, and you receive no bounty for killing any of Astrid's hostages.

I never do all that icky "dead thrall" stuff. Gives me the shivers.

True, true, it is morally terrible, but I figure that if I only use it on evil people to do good things or useful things, all is well.

I can go that far.... for others, not for myself though.

Morality, we know by name!
Through different walks of life we came!
Are these walks and paths to blame?

OP you butched up a few assaination, and now you want to destroy the DB, because you have bounty on your head. Iky staff aside, shame on you. Maybe you should've reported them to the City guards instead of playing judge, jury, and executioner.