The first order of business would be to provide my services to every Jarl so I gain their trust. I think they'd trust me if I annihilated all the forsworn. I'd mainly look forward to slaughtering those vile hagravens who are always nearby.
Don't they creep you out? They are so ugly and probably smell worse than fresh skeever feces. I'd rather put cockroaches in my pants than let them get anywhere near me. Which is why I blast them to pieces with giant fire balls from a safe distance. I don't even bother searching the corpses: thats just disgusting. Why would anybody want to touch that rotting filth? I don't care if there are gold necklaces stuffed up their buttocks. I'm confident even vultures would avoid devouring such grotesque carcasses.
Anyway after the Jarls trust me I'll start to recruit more members into my army and take over Skyrim. I'll boot the greybeards and Big P off the mountain because it is the highest peak in Skyrim and second highest in Tamriel. I'd like my palace and fortress to be up there. That would be cool.
What would you do with your army?
