» Mon Jun 11, 2012 11:04 am
The point is well taken that some quests not being available to all people in the world is reasonable and realistic. Yes they did have this in Morrowind, but if you will recall, those were only faction quests. Non-faction related quests were in no way restricted even in that game. The quest to recover that amulet, while magic related, is not a College of Winterhold quest. The location is simply the same dungeon as one of them. Their designing it this way was a mistake. I kind of wonder why Tolfdir opening it was the only possible way in given they made an independent quest there too. Which one you've started could've scripted different situations. Tolfdir doesn't head to it until the event of you talking to him. You being on the Galdur's amulet quest could've caused it to unlock and have him show up with entourage in tow and speak to you of how you were led there on this other information, causing him to invite you to join the College's expedition.
It's kind of moot at this point, since it's doubtful they would "alter" things like this in a patch of dlc. No I fear there is only one workaround, and that is to join. This may not satisfy for a role play perspective, but you are free to ignore there whole quest line thereafter. One thing you didn't mention is if you play this on PC or not. Because I don't know if there is a similar command, but in Oblivion and Morrowind with console, you could simply add yourself to any faction directly. If so, then you could do this, enter the ruins as a "honorary member", then remove yourself from the faction with another console command.
As for getting by on console, fortify magicka hood (like the one you find in that first locked cage in the Helgen dungeon) and/or fortify magicka potions should be able to put you within range of casting that spell, if necessary, with fortify conjuration robes or potions. Maybe a fortify speech potion before you talk to her (and maybe amulet of speechcraft) and that route could work.