Okay so I have a character that married Lydia. I've never once seen her sleep in breezehome,but when I moved to Proudspire in Solitude i've found her sleeping on several occassions....IN THE BAsemanT.
It's the same situation with Jordis and another one of my characters...she only sleeps in the basemant. Has anyone else had to deal with this,and if so are we just SOL when it comes to getting lovers comfort from our Housecarl spouses?

I'm married to Jordis at the moment, she's really gorgeous and skilled in battle, but she too often refers to me as thane, rather than housband... and she never sleeps.

My Jordis sleeps all the time when I leave her in Proudspire but in the basemant on a sleeping bag. She nevers sleeps in the bed upstairs,so i've never gotten lovers comfort

I read topic title as Housecat.

I was very D:

So far I have never actually gotten Lydia to sleep in bed and her constanly calling me thane is wearing on my nerves a bit.

?

To get the Lover's Comfort buff you just have to sleep in the house where you spouse is. If you are not getting the buff, tell your housecarl you want to move to their place, which is actually your house, since they are your housecarl. With any spouse, it's advisable to say you want to live in their house first, sleep at least once, and then get them to move to your house if you want to.

With Iona, if I tell her to move into my house (Honeyside), I can trade with her. If I tell her to move into her house (also Honeyside) I can get the Lover's Comfort bonus. It's always one or the other.

housecat?!......even for skyrim that is wrong

maybe they just dont want to sleep with you

if it was me ( and this is me) i would fus do rah them onto the bed! or maybe its time you got some inspiration from "the lust argonian maid" hmmm?

This^ afterwards you can gain the lovers comfort whenever you sleep in a bed with your spouse in the same cell, This includes dungeons if your spouse is currently following.

Ow. Even Cathay-Raght don't sharpen their spears.

Sometimes the "Lover's Comfort" statement doesn't appear after you sleep. Just go in to Active Effects and it should be there. I've had a similar issue in Proudspire Manor and Breezehome with "Well Rested" not showing, but it does appear in Active Effects.

I never had the Lover's Comfort buff show up in my Active Effects until I told Marcurio to move to 'his house' and then I went and hired a room in the Bee and Barb and slept for an hour. I got the buff and since then we've moved to 2 other houses of mine and it still works. I think this just gets bugged for some people. Not sure this is really what the OP cares about, though. Maybe he just wants his wife to sleep in his double bed while he's in it? ;P

I believe its a glitch, at some point of the patching my character stopped getting the bonus(I have several characters) I used to "cheat" marrying with Jenassa, having an awesome fighter by my side and sleeping in forts and dungeons to get the bonus during the travels. But haven't seen the bonus in a while...

Only once have I ever come home from a quest to find Lydia asleep in my bed, but I couldn't take proper advantage as I'm a Werewolf. Really must cure myself.