Is this funny, awful or both?

The following is completely true.

I am on my third playthrough of Skyrim (PS3) and am a level 42 Nord; I started this third playthrough because alcohol ruined my character's life on my second playthrough.

My wife was out of town a month ago and I went out with some friends and got pretty hammered...ok, really freakin' hammered. I cabbed it back to my house and figured: "hey, wife isn't home, I can play as much Skyrim as I want." I passed out while playing and when I woke up the next morning I didn't remember anything I had done in the game (swear to the gods).

My character was standing in my house in Whiterun wearing nothing but a sword and a Daedra helmet, literally everything from the tables and shelves was on the floor, Ysolda (my wife) was dead, the "Do you get to the cloud district very often?" guy was dead in the alchemy lab area and Lydia was lying dead at the table in my room. I figure it must have been one of those glitches where you enter your house and the NPC talking to you follows you in. In my drunken state, when I "arrived home," I must have assumed Ysolda was carrying on an affair with that dude so I killed both of them and then run upstairs and killed Lydia.

I checked my inventory and had over 20 stolen items - everything from leather strips to clothes irons. I figured I should unload some of the stuff but when I went to Belefor's, the place was trashed and there were three dead bodies behind the counter (Belefor included). No guards were after me (I must have abused my Thane priviledge) so I kept playing, but when I fast-traveled to Markarth, all the guards started attacking me on sight. I ran into the Silver-blood Inn, there were about 7 dead people lying around the bar. I figured I needed to cool my heals so I went to Hjerim and found, again, my house trashed, my house carl dead and a pile of axes on the floor - a pile. Ok, I need to split again so off to Honeyside. Garden was ravaged - everything harvested yet no food in my inventory, at least 6 chickens lying dead with arrows in them, two bodies in my back yard (turning into compost I suppose) and another dead house carl.

I wanted to laugh but I was like really questioning if this was unhealthy behavior. I layed off the game for a few weeks.

Rofl, this thread made me laugh pretty hard. Thanks for the effort of writing it all down.

I have a feeling this is mostly trolling but as that was not the question, then I would have to say that it is indeed awful. A Nord never has to question his drinking problems... er hobby

Sounds like the aftermath of a wild party

Take comfort in this - you did nothing drunk you aren't secretly capable of doing while sober, so there's really nothing to be ashamed about - this is who you really are

...

Not trolling, honest to goodness truth.

Did you take a screenie...this is one of those times you really should've.

And where is Sam?

I did not. Most classic moment was standing in Breezehome w/ only helmet and sword, screen rotating around my character, only to move my player and see the carnage I had unleashed.

Upon reflection, I do sort of remember carrying out some of the aforementioned hijinx (specifically assasinating several chickens in Riften), but I definitely don't remember killing everyone in Breezehome, collecting a bunch of axes and going berserk in the silverblood inn. IIRC, my housecarl in Hjerim started sh*t w/ me first. I've heard the last bit is not entirely uncommon.

A True Nord doesn't have a drinking problem. He drinks, he gets drunk, he trashes four cities and kills everyone he loves, he falls down - NO PROBLEM!

Just a FYI:

This isn't really a problem, so long as you confine these hijinks to your game. Keep a backup copy and you never have to worry about accidentally going on a Drunken Skyrim Rampage ever again!

One more interesting tidbit: I had 2 newly discovered on my map the next morning. I apparently found the Dark Brotherhood's abandonned clubhouse outside of Dawnstar and Hela's Folly so I obviously went swimming.

Well clearly that's why you took your clothes off. See? It all makes sense now!

What really burned me, moreso than drunkenly murdering Ysolda (so go figure), was that I usually roll in the Nightengale armor and that was nowhere to be found the next morning.

Probably lost during a drunken game of strip poker, that's enough to send anyone off on a killing spree.

Awesome story heh

I got drunk once while playing and ended up in the Sightless pit or something. I just remember sobering up and wondering where the heck I was.

Might want to check near the Holly swimming area...

There are two options - I was being drunk and careless and I just dropped the armor or I sold the armor to Belefor to buy several axes from various vendors, and simply forgot to take the armor back after I killed him, his assistant and an innocent patron who was just there for some leather strips and charcoal - wrong place wrong time, and sh*t happens. I usually leave my cash in the lockbox in Proudspire.

A combination of shame, not being able to dispose of Ysolda's remains, not having any housecarls left to watch my sh*t while I'm out dealing death and the loss of my treasured Nightengale armor led me to re-start the game. Once I figured out that, even with Ysolda out of the picture I couldn't marry Jordis' fine azz, it was a no-brainer. Sure I could of let Mjoll hang but she never shuts up, talks over NPCs when they're telling me important sh*t and whatnot.

How could you do this exactly? Belethor's inventory is seperate to his store's inventory...

He didn't have the armor is my point.

I usually take the RP part of the game seriously and try to do what I would do IRL. In the third playthrough, I've really only gone outside that rule twice when I committed 2 really bad crimes: I stole a bunch of rare books from the College of Winterhold's library and sold them to buy Ebony ingots (I was really into wearing Ebony armor for a minute) and I broke into the Mortar and Pestle in Dawnstar and stole a bunch of chaurus eggs - of course I killed Frida because I didn't need the heat.

No, you said: "and simply forgot to take the armor back after I killed him". Even had you remembered, without using a glitch, it would have been impossible to retrieve anything sold to Belethor.

Well, better trash the game than RL, don't you think?


He's watching and laughing. Hasn't been so entertained in a hundred years.

only thing missing from the tale is the OP finding a goat in the bedroom.

If the OP had come to and found his character holding the Sanguine Rose, that story would have been PERFECT.