Juib's journal

Post » Mon Nov 16, 2009 12:00 am

Day 1

Well, i did it again. i saw that stall filled with delicious rare scamp meat and couldn't take it. This is my third strike and im going to jail. They told me i could take one item with me to jail and i chose this diary. I had to sneak a quill in just so i could wright in it. For ink i am using my own blood, which turns out to not be so painful as you would think. woooo, i am getting sort of dizzy, i am going to lay down for a while.

Day 3

Got a package from my brother today. i opened it up and it was a prison shank. very funny milo.

Day 4

Being in prison isn't that bad. Bed is warm, food is good, and the guards don't beat me that much. oh yeah, there is this guy across the hall from me. dunmer. real dike. always talking about how he is going to look my wife up when he gets out. what he doesn't know is that i have never had a wife or any real friends. Jokes on him now.

Day 7

I heard the guards talking about how they are moving prisoners to morrowind for a work assignment. The guy across the hall says that it is a cover for execution. i don't really believe him but i don't want to find out either. But hey, maybe if i go to morrowind i can carve out a little bit of a life there. What's the worst that could happen?

Day 8
Kick ASS! I gave a guard a sheet of paper from this diary so he could wright a letter home, and in return he gave me a slightly used inkwell! No more passing out from blood loss!

Day 10
Turns out my number has been randomly selected for the next shipment of prisoners to morrowind. I am a little nervous but actually pretty excited. i hear scamps rome wild over there. mmmmmmm, scamp meat. They even got somebody to fill my cell already, nice guy. Told him i am going to morrowind and i was glad and he laughed so hard he almost soiled his trousers. Don't know why, but hey, i will be leaving all tis behind in a few days.

Day 12
They put me on a boat for morrowind today. Besides the eight guards with razor sharp spears and a rat i name Juib jr., there is only one other prisoner onboard. Forgot the blokes name but he is a real cool guy. Says he has strange dreams and didn't ever know his parents but i already like him. reminds me of my uncle.

Day 15
Bad storm happening. boat is being knocked around like a toy, but my new friend is just sleeping as peaceful as ever. wish i could be him.

Day 16
Those bastards took him away! they came early just after we woke up, and took whatever his name is away. poor bastard, he is all skinny and sickly, bet he won't last a week.

Day 18
After two days travel, we reached some place called solstheim. Place svcks. Freezing cold, and no booze. How you gonna have an island in the middle of nowhere with no booze! Work assignments svck to. Apparently i am supposed to help build some place called raven rock or something like that. I think i am going to make a break for it tomorrow. I would rather be lieng face down with an arrow in my back than live without booze for another day.

Day 20
They caught me trying to escape. They put me in a detention cell for eight days with half rations. But hey! they serve scamp meat here! the other people who try to escape sometimes give me theirs. Life is good.

Day 24
I was in jail today. fun.

Day 28
Today i am supposed to get out again, but i don't know if i want to. they are having a hard time setting the place up. something about not being able to get land rights. maybe if i escape again i can get back in detainment with my deliciously greasy scamp meat. worth a try.

Day 29
I can't believe it. i made the mistake of being to good at that last escape. i got out of the camp, and nothing happened. they must not have seen me leave. well, i geuss i will just walk north until i find someplace to stay.

Day 31
Today i saw a flying schooner crash into the ground. I have decided that solstheim is weird.

Day 32
found a nice ice cave today. i figure that while i am in here huddling for warmth so i don't freeze to death, i might as well change my plan. i am going to walk inland and see where it takes me i couldn't possibly be worse off than i am now.

Day 33 Found a nice looking cabin on a frozen pond. i hear signing coming from inside. might as well check it out.

Day 34?
Last night i had some of the old man who lived in the cabin's candy. bad idea. next thing i know i am in balmora in broad daylight wearing a dress and a dunce cap. My head hurts, i am going to bed.

Day 36
After sleeping off that "candy" for two days i am going over to pelgoid. i heard you can get work as an farm hand over there.

Day 37.
Today i heard some "outlander" brought back the booze to solstheim. [censored].
User avatar
Donatus Uwasomba
 
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Joined: Sun May 27, 2007 7:22 pm

Post » Sun Nov 15, 2009 11:50 pm

Well, obvious grammer tune ups could help, perhaps copy and paste into MS Word and fix there. The language is the first thing I noticed after that, particularly the "Kick A**", I know that in writing these kinds of things we can put in certain things that convey the meaning to the reader better by not following what the people might say, but there is a limit. Seems a bit too connected to the Nerevarine, calling guards names because they took him...

Besides that, it seems to not have much of a plot, but I doubt that's what you were going for. Seems more comical than anything else, and it serves that purpose well, I always wondered what happened to poor Juib. Fairly well thought out, but I felt like there was a bit more you could have said. Perhaps make the blood written ones shorter and then the ink ones longer :shrug: Also, I doubt the legion would let someone mail you a shank...But that would be a joke, now wasn't it ^^

Nice work, is it done or is there more?
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Marcus Jordan
 
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