Guard 1: 'Sir'
Guard 2:''Yes?''
Guard 1''Sir i just wanted to congratulate you on getting your own squad.''
eh dunno if it needs its own thread.. but i found it pretty funny.

"I used to be an Empresses Bodyguard like you, until I took a sleep dart to the knee"
"Some people call this junk, me I call it bone charms"
We should start a new thread on Skyrim quotes recycled for Dishonored
"My cousin's out fighting assassins, and what do I get? Guard Duty."
Possibly, yes, lol. I can never remember.
Oh, another thing that cracked me up was the book in Timsh's house with some gay erotica in it. "The Young Prince of Tyvia". That was so unexpected, made me chuckle.