So my girlfriend isnt the most computer literate person in the world
but she tries to be sweet
she tried to change the picture on my laptop to a picture of me and her

she wound up deleted several things off my laptop
she also somehow deleted mozilla and adding several tool bars to internet explorer that i had to get the download off my other computer to get mozilla to install because IE was so slow
I am curious how she wound up doing that

Got any stories of the computer Illiterate?

I've taught my mum over 50 times now how to use a computer, including the basics like using the x in the corner to close a program. She also often forgets how to go to google so she closes the browser and reopens it.

I've done tech support over the phone with luddites before...

... Sometimes the nightmares still keep me up at night....

I heard a story about someone who thought at one point that his computer was being hacked by Interpol or something like that.

when someone more knowledgeable than him came around to take a look at it, the guy pointed at the screen going on



"See? Some big time Fench general named Failure (use French pronunciation for that) is reading my disk!!"



the screen did say; 'general failure reading disk'

note: the guy's English wasn't as good as his French

lmao this is jokes

I was assisting the tech support when I was in high school. Several times I had to go to classrooms to assist teachers with their computer problems. One time I had to go to an older English teachers room. He said his computer hasn't worked in a month. It seems one of the students unplugged the monitor and that was the only problem.

Another time, a neighbor (who had just moved from Nigeria) came to me and asked if I could look at his desktop. He said, "I think I may have a virus."

He had XP (a pirated copy that was themed to look like Vista), with literally hundreds of virus/trojan alerts when I ran a scan.

nope.

swear on a stack of holy books yay high that it's true.


my mom on the phone: I'm not sure I'm doing this right. (installing software.. couldn't find the icon)

me: what's on your desktop?

mom: Why? uhh, some pens, paper.. my coffee, oh.. and an eraser.. is that important?

me:


***

mom: okay.., now what? (trying to figure out her agenda software works)

me: okay.., pull up your calender.

mom: Why pull it up? It's right here on the wall beside me..

me:



this one's for Deffy:

Uhm, excuse me, but can someone help me fix my automatic coffeecup holder? You know, the one that slides out of the front of the computer whenever I push the button..

..it won't work anymore

My uncle works in IT, some lady rang him and asked about some problem with her computer so he told her to right click on the desktop. She wrote click on her desk.

In order to check his email, my dad uses google to search for yahoo, then on the yahoo page he does a search for "yahoo mail"

I wish this was uncommon, I see it nearly every day at work, one of my coworkers doing a web search for an address, and all too often my boss...

I saw a comic strip on someone screaming in their head while watching their boss do this, I wish I had saved it, I'd put it up on my wall at work...

The prince has fallen on tough times...

I get called into my home office while im getting ready for work "JAY JAY I NEED HELPP"
thinking she hurt her self because she is clumsy i go in there and she sitting at my linux computer
she looks at me "I think its broken because it isnt starting windows 7"
:wallbash:This is probably why she is a console gamer who only uses the computer to look for guides for her various games
She is worse then old people sometimes

Hey, my friend's dad is in his 70s and a consulting DBA for a bank. He used to be employed by them directly until they let him go... only to realize a month or so later that they can't get stuff done without him so he got hired as a consultant

Old people aren't Luddites. Luddites come in all shapes and sizes.

I hope he had the decency to release some of the $6,000,000,000,000 he has salted away in some secret bank account without making you fork over your own bank account info. It's the least you could expect for unfrigging his PC for him.

My father tried to toggle WIFI on his Android phone, he managed to reboot the system to factory setting.

I think the worst stories i've heard, and can believe, are the people that call up tech support lines, and complain their computer isn't working. First question that is always asked, "Is your computer plugged in?" or "Did you turn it on?"

After that, a long pause is heard with the call for help being fulfilled.

Thankfully i'm computer savy, but I have my illiterate moments. Hardest one this year was installing a new graphic card in my computer since i've never done that.

Having worked as the only IT 'person' (Person is probably the best way to describe it: I did the phone support, implemented new features, admin'd the current systems) in a fairly large business for a year and some of the conversations I've had with people border on insane.

Thing is, nobody was interested in really learning how things worked, they would just prefer to ring me every time. I guess I enabled them by just caving in and providing support for every stupid issue but it was better than constantly battling with management to persuade them that they actually needed to learn this basic stuff.

"The Night I Helped Give my Grandmother Computer Advice over the Phone while a Raging Fire was Crossing over a Mountain and Threatening to Burn my Neighborhood"

G: Hagas, that technician got my computer up, but how do I use it?
H: Well, did the technician tell you how to turn it on?
G: Some button somewhere, it glowed green with this symbol when he turned it on himself
H: Push that button again gramma, it should probably be right in the middle of your computer tower, that's the giant black box that's next to your computer.
G: I'm pushing the button but it won't come on
H: Try just holding it until you hear some clicking sound
G: The screen gave me an error message, saying the computer is not on.
H: You're pushing the button that turns on the screen, not the computer, push the big button in the center of the big black box that your technician put next to your screen.
G: it's still giving me the error message
H: Gramma, is there a large, black box next to the screen?
G: I don't know, there this big tall black rectangle, but I don't see a box
H: that's it gramma, now do you see a big button in the center with something that looks similar to the symbol you saw when it was on?

*Later that Conversation*

G: I want to see CNN how do I use the internet?
H: Open up your browser, it's the giant blue "E" with a little yellow line through it
G: what do I use to click it?
H: ..uhm, your mouse.
G: is that that little white arrow?
H: yes, move the little white arrow onto the giant, blue "E" and click on it
G: where's the arrow?
H: Here, do what I do, I want you to slowly move your mouse upward and slightly to the left, as your doing this, look for the little white arrow, it should be gradually moving towards the upper left corner of your screen.
G: I don't see anything
H: Try holding down the left mouse button and then move your mouse in any direction, a big blue box should be appearing now.
G: Hagas, there're a bunch of icons that have these little white boxes around them now, is that a good thing?
H: yes, don't worry about it, just look at the giant box that's surrounding all those icons, do you see a little white arrow on one of the corners?
G: Oh there it is, okay, I see it.
H: good, now drag that to the giant blue "E"
G: *Does as I ask* this isn't CNN, this is some strange page with a bunch of pictures and news stories of people I don't care about.
H: That's just the homepage, now you have to search for CNN

*This is the kicker, she's been pretty good up to this point, a little slow, but that's understandable considering she's never used a computer before, but it's about to get insane*

H: Do you see a long, white searchbar at the top of your screen
G: I see a ton of white everywhere on this page, what white am I looking for?
H: Look up, in the center, or slightly to the left you should see a long, white strip with a looking glass or a star at the right of the long strip.
G: I see no strip
H: Okay, look at the top left corner of your screen and start to move your eyes towards the right, tell me what you see
G: I see some arrow symbols going in either direction, a bunch of empty space, a looking glass, a little round arrow, a giant "X", a house, a star-
H: Okay, click on the empty space
G: click it with what?
H: ...your mouse.
G: what's the mouse?
H: the little white arrow you used before
G: where is it?
H: were you moving your mouse while looking for search bar?
G: I don't know, how do I know if I was?
H: that little black thing your right hand has been on the whole time controls the little white arrow that's on your screen, were you moving your right hand a lot?
G: I think so
H: okay, wherever you moved your hand is wherever the arrow will have gone on your screen.
G: where's the arrow?
H: Okay, let's try this again, I want you to move the mouse upward and slightly to the left, be very very slow, and look around the screen, look for a little white arrow that's moving towards your left
G: I see something moving
H: that's probably the arrow, I want you to follow that arrow to the long empty space you saw before
G: *clicking sound* Oh dammit Hagas it's taken me somewhere else now
H: What happened?
G: I clicked the button like you said and it's taken me to some story about an actress
H: Okay, you probably accidentally clicked on one of the stories your homepage was showing you
G: how do I get back
H: it doesn't matter, you can get to CNN from there too
G: No, I want to go back
H: ...uhm, okay, you know those little arrows next to the blank space
G: yes?
H: move your little white arrow up to the arrow that's pointing to the left
G: I can't find the little white arrow
H: okay, stop moving the mouse, I want you to just scan your screen, very carefully for the little white arrow
G: I think I found it
H: Okay, now just move the arrow up to the big, blue arrow that's pointing left
G: Oh no, I've lost it again,
H: how?
G: it's this long black line now, in this long white strip
H: oh, okay, just click left
G: I did, what's supposed to happen now?
H: Do you see a flashing cursor in the blank space?
G: no
H: look to the far left of the blank space
G: I see the arrows
H: next to the arrows, do you see a little black line that's flashing?
G: no..okay yes...now it's gone again, it keeps coming back
H: that's normal
G: are you sure
H: yes, positive
G: will this take me back to the other page?
H: no, I'm going to take you to CNN
G: I want to go back
H: Gramma, there's a raging fire not too far from my house, I can explain everything in detail later, let me just take you to CNN's website for now
G: What do I need to do?
H: I want you to type "C" "N" "N" "Dot" "Com",
G: what?
H: C.N.N.period.C.O.M
G: with what?
H: With your keyboard, think of it like a type-writer
G: *clicking sound* Hagas I typed C and now the cursor's gone
H: yes, that's normal, just keep typing
G: no, I don't want to get rid of the cursor, you said I needed it there
H: Gramma, when you type something the cursor will disappear
G: is there a way to make it stay
H: I'll have to get back to you on that
G: I'm typing something but nothing's happening
H: okay, try moving your mouse back to the search-bar
G: where is the mouse?

at this point I couldn't focus, I told my grandmother I'd have to explain this all again later, but you know, giving tech support in the middle of a natural disaster sure was fun =D

As a technologically impaired grandmother all I have to say to you young whipper-snappers is "One day you'll have a donkey of your own."I'll be mad when I stop laughing.

Sure I do. Like getting lost in the ubuntu terminal and then forgetting my root password.

Or not having a single clue how to access directories from the terminal.

Or better yet, installing it on my machine as dual boot, and then installing it on vbox, and vbox is too stupid to realize I have 64bit CPU and keeps saying I can't use 64 version of linux, even though I just installed the 64 bit version on a partition, making the other installation completely redundant =D.

Herro stupido linux novice with no clue what he's doing.

When my brother and I were little we liked to mess around on my dad's computer. We'd type in weird commands in DOS and then see what happens. One day, my brother decides to type in, "Format C:" and hits enter. He then comes downstairs where my dad and I were watching TV and asks, 'Dad, what does format C mean?" I've never seen my dad move so fast in his entire life. The whole time he's running up the stairs he's yelling...'No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no!!', but alas, it was too late. My brother killed the computer. It was by far, one of the funniest things ever. It also wasn't such a huge issue as my dad was big on backups. He had a backup of the backup's backup. After he passed away I went through his office and threw out a lot of stuff going back to DOS and the Apple IIe and Win. 3.1.He kept back ups of everything. I on the other hand do not.

Another time I had built a computer and was having problems with it, it was my first one so I called my brother who is now in the IT field and makes a living working on computers to ask him for some technical help. It was a simple question about the drivers for the motherboard and he couldn't answer my question. 'I ahhh...have no idea. I've never built a computer before.' is what he said, to which I replied, "Dude, you do this [censored] for a living and you don't know how to build one?"

I have plenty of stories involving computer-related incidents involving the computer illiterate.
Most of them involve me trying to explain to my coupon-obsessed mother that third-party websites that say they have coupon codes for every website tend to be riddled with viruses, and that is the reason her computer is slow. I once installed Spybot:S&D, and she got mad at me for putting it on her computer because it apparently "slowed down" her computer when she runs 12 toolbars and visits ad-riddled webpages on a daily basis. The sad part about this is she does this all on IE on her business computer, and has no comprehension of the phrase "cyber security". She eventually got a particularly nasty virus that infected all of her .pdf files. I came in, deleted them all, and the very next day, I see her on the exact same website she visited that gave her the virus in the first place. The worst part is that whenever someone knows how to start Word and use IE, they immediately think they have mastered the art of computers and don't need to take advice from anyone.

A year later and after I built my own computer right in front of her eyes, she finally gave up on contesting my knowledge and just tells me to fix whatever is wrong.
If you want people to stop questioning your computer literacy, just build a computer in front of them. They look at you like you just parted the red sea.

Hah, my condolences I guess i'm getting off easy since my grandma is good enough with computers to write books with them

As for my own computer illiteracy, i still haven't learnred how to properly handle keyboards. Busted another one, and only working one i could find has the bottom row of keys busted, so i have to use the on-sreen keyoard to fill in the missing letters

I still don't know my way around MSprompt either. If you come to me about command lines, my head will physically transform into this: ?

I have not laughed so hard in a week.