I am designing a new Mod I will call 'The Argonian Hunt'. This Mod will include several New Items, A specific Spell (Per help of the Bard Collage), new animations with sounds as well as other specific changes.

First, we have the Argonian Arrow; now this piece of weaponry is special as it can only be crafted by hunting down specific items laid out in a book that would eventually pop up entitled, Argonian Fillet.

That’s right people; you can now eat the Aronians you kill. However, Argonian meat will not show up in their inventory lest you shoots them with an Argonian Arrow.

Argonian meat cannot be eaten raw as it must be first prepared following the cooking directions detailed within the book.

Once Argonian Fillet is complete its consumption will result in a belly weight gain that lasts for one week. (Werewolf transformations unfortunately disrupt the process preventing the next step)

After the week has passed a special spell is cast in order to enchant the Argonian Poop which is extracted via special toilet that comes with the mod. Please note that the deification process cannot occur without the spell whose book is located within the Bards College.

For fun, the spell incantation can be read in fine print within the book’s pages which reads:

From a dine at nine,
To bolus and chyme
A wretched slime
Per a hint of wine
With squirts of bile
So horrid and vile
to wipe the smile
From even Gomer Pile
A loopy doopy
of luscious poopie.

Once the spell is casted on the toilet, animations kicks in and the character hops on it for a nice push. I took the liberty of adding the in-game grunting sounds which made it sound quite nice.

Once the poo is extracted it can be placed into your inventory as a new ingredient. Just happens that Argonian Poop is quite toxic, for even tasting it can prove…hard on your stomach. Suffice it to say, Argonian Poop is an assassins sweet tasting dream hehe…

wat

Closed for being rather...ummm...distasteful.