in Oblivion you got the castle/fort and frostage tower, the lair and the pirate cave to more or less call home.

is there any thing like that in Skyrim? do you get any kind of large home or any thing that you can mess around with, maybe use stands like in Knight of the Nine to place armor on?

There are several homes, the one in Solitude is the biggest stock house there is. However, even the smallest home, the one in White Run, has all the storage and room you would need for the whole game. All homes have mannequins. The Hearthfire DLC lets you build up to 3 more homes, rather Estates, and customize them how you want. Dawnguard even gets you a castle, but that never really feels like your home, just a base you can go to.