I'm not too keen on the Dragonscale armour myself, I think it's too flashy or odd looking lol.. I must admit I do like some of the hooded robes but I do need much more protection that that especially when I run into some Soldiers who claim to be someone and asking for money etc...

*Bless my cotton socks, sniffles*
I definitely agree for the female http://www.uesp.net/wiki/File:SR-item-Dragonscale_Armor_Female.jpg, it looks weird I mean that briastplate basically looks like the top piece of a corset and the shoulder pads are awful (is she playing american football?), and yeah at level 42 you probably need alot more armor than hooded robes which is no armor at all, if you want to melee things in any case.
Btw, http://www.uesp.net/wiki/File:SR-item-Ebony_Mail.jpg is what the Ebony Mail looks like on a male character, it's basically like the ebony briastplate without the shoulderpads and with a black chainmail texture. It's probably similar for a female character.
Negatory. There's a shrine to Boethiah just outside of Windhelm. Once you leave the city, follow the road left (if you're standing on the bridge looking straight away from the city) and you should see the marker before too long. Don't even have to stray from the road.
Go up there, (make sure to bring a follower with you. Any will do; just go hire some poor sap in a tavern) talk to some folks, and make your follower activate the thingymajig infront of the shrine. Follower dies, giant brawl breaks out, kill everybody, Ebony Mail.
Negatory? He was correct, that's how I started Boethia's quest. You can start it in several ways. The way you wrote is just one of them.