My Dark Brotherhood followers don't do as I command- I tell em to sit, as soon as they do, they get back up and step on my head (sometimes) or stand in front of me until I get up.

While you speak the dark brotherhood are coming to your house to murder your family.

I have the one thing they should fear - a fence that requires a key and is taller than 3 feet.

Unless they bring a follower along, and give that follower a lockpick, then order that follower stand next to the gate, then get 'uncomfortably' close so the follower backs up through the gate, therefore opening the gate.