» Fri Jul 22, 2011 8:46 pm I've been wondering since it seems I'm not having very much of it lately (a little bit maybe, after all I′m writing this topic, but far from enough) and I have no idea why. I've always been very passionate about at least something but now I find myself sitting down to do work I thought I′d want to do only to feel like I don't want to do it, before I′d sit down to do what I had a passion for doing and I′d just do it because I had a drive to do it, but now there doesn't seem to be anything that gives me that drive and I'm left having to actively think about what I should want to do.
After writing this I realize most of it is ranting about myself, so I put it in a spoiler tag so that anyone who wants to read it can do that and anyone who just wants to get to the core of the matter, the question of this topic, can do just that.
Spoiler
As a child I'd dream about being an athlete so I'd go around joining all sorts of sports like gymnastics, freestyle athletics, football and many others, I′d also dream about being a waiter so I'd join my mother in the kitchen with an uncanny interest for a 6 year old helping her prepare every night.
Again as a child but a little bit older one I′d dream about being a mathematician since I′d found out I had a talent for that so I′d spend time working on my maths and then I also got a big passion for games so I′d spend hours just playing wondering if I could be a pro gamer some day and go on tournaments and win prizes.
Fast forward a little bit further and I suddenly want to be a programmer, I'd work my butt off in school after seriously neglecting schoolwork to make time for gaming, and I worked my way into getting on a computers course in college after spending the last 2 years of high school working up on my academic skills again.
Now I've been in college for two years but now I feel like I′d have more fun being a writer than a programmer, but problem is I just don't feel nearly as passionate about it or anything else it seems as it stands.
I've always had a great drive to work hard and I've always had things I wanted to do and such but now I′m not really feeling the drive to do much anything and I′m sitting on a 3 months worth of unused paychecks because I simply haven't found anything I feel like buying or doing.
It seems pretty clear to me that what I′m lacking is passion, but I've never pondered where passion stems from since I've always just had it. Where are the origins of it ? How do you acquire it ? Don't get me wrong, I feel happy and life is fine. But I know I could do more with a little more passion for things, but it seems very strange to think about finding desire to have and do things, shouldn't you just have the desire automatically ? A friend of mine for example is very driven when it comes to drawing and he can spend hours drawing pictures, and another friend of mine is very passionate about generally succeeding and he went on a speed course in college taking like double the normal courses per semester that most do.
It′s like being tired and wide awake at the same time. I know I have the skills to do many great things, like I mentioned maths, my older brother took the same maths course I took last year (he′s a bit behind on maths) and we both got through it, he with a 6 and I with an 8, yet he spent hours practicing while I only ever felt like studying while in class and when he dragged me to help him with his math problems. Still he's far more likely to achieve something than I am I think, since he has this drive, this passion, while I may have talent I'm not going anywhere fast if I don't feel like going anywhere.
Again as a child but a little bit older one I′d dream about being a mathematician since I′d found out I had a talent for that so I′d spend time working on my maths and then I also got a big passion for games so I′d spend hours just playing wondering if I could be a pro gamer some day and go on tournaments and win prizes.
Fast forward a little bit further and I suddenly want to be a programmer, I'd work my butt off in school after seriously neglecting schoolwork to make time for gaming, and I worked my way into getting on a computers course in college after spending the last 2 years of high school working up on my academic skills again.
Now I've been in college for two years but now I feel like I′d have more fun being a writer than a programmer, but problem is I just don't feel nearly as passionate about it or anything else it seems as it stands.
I've always had a great drive to work hard and I've always had things I wanted to do and such but now I′m not really feeling the drive to do much anything and I′m sitting on a 3 months worth of unused paychecks because I simply haven't found anything I feel like buying or doing.
It seems pretty clear to me that what I′m lacking is passion, but I've never pondered where passion stems from since I've always just had it. Where are the origins of it ? How do you acquire it ? Don't get me wrong, I feel happy and life is fine. But I know I could do more with a little more passion for things, but it seems very strange to think about finding desire to have and do things, shouldn't you just have the desire automatically ? A friend of mine for example is very driven when it comes to drawing and he can spend hours drawing pictures, and another friend of mine is very passionate about generally succeeding and he went on a speed course in college taking like double the normal courses per semester that most do.
It′s like being tired and wide awake at the same time. I know I have the skills to do many great things, like I mentioned maths, my older brother took the same maths course I took last year (he′s a bit behind on maths) and we both got through it, he with a 6 and I with an 8, yet he spent hours practicing while I only ever felt like studying while in class and when he dragged me to help him with his math problems. Still he's far more likely to achieve something than I am I think, since he has this drive, this passion, while I may have talent I'm not going anywhere fast if I don't feel like going anywhere.
So where does this passion come from that makes you feel more "I WANNA BE KING OF THE WORLD!" than "I′m content with what I have" ? Have you ever felt like you just didn't need anything ? And even then if you have how do you motivate yourself to want things, how do you induce passion in yourself ?
As a side-note, sorry if this is a very corny/weird/melodramatic topic for these forums. Still thought I′d let it fly here.
