i cannot find a way to arrive at the place yo talk to the graybeards! ive been trying for two days! i need help. thanks in advance for any suggestions/hints.

Clairvoyance?

you have to go to Ivarstead, there's a way up to the greybeards

And this is why I miss morrowind's instructions on how to find places.

I
V
A
R
S
T
E
A
D

watch out for the frost troll on the way up

I lol'ed on the part where you said "two days".

Go to Ivarstead, find the steps, climb them, kill whatever to eat you, read those cool verses on the side of the path. Oh and before you start climbing you might want to talk to Klimmer, he has a misc. quest to deliver some stuff up there and that way you get it done.

And to get to Ivarstead...

Long way around the back via Helgen or west from Riften will let you stay on well traveled roads.

Or cross country trek it.

I had a problem with this also but I found a way. Come in from the east.