i think my wife is cheating on me with faendal... : V

» Thu Jun 21, 2012 3:16 pm

So I keep seeing faendal around in windhelm, so I followed him until he went Into my house. He then sat down and started spouting about how he feels for her... I think I should lure him into a dragons den.
Btw my wife is Camilla.

» Thu Jun 21, 2012 6:28 pm

Mjoll is cheating on me too, and she is supposedly "good."

» Fri Jun 22, 2012 1:13 am

is a glich faendal allways is whit camilla same problem with mjoll

» Fri Jun 22, 2012 1:57 am

So I keep seeing faendal around in windhelm, so I followed him until he went Into my house. He then sat down and started spouting about how he feels for her... I think I should lure him into a dragons den.
Btw my wife is Camilla.

murder the stalker, problem solved

» Fri Jun 22, 2012 3:28 am

Do what any sane person would do.Kill fendal. Take a massive life insurance policy on camilla, kill her, fake your own death after laundering the cash, and live the rest of your days out on a warm tropical island off the coast of valenwood, with hot woodelf bikini girls feeding you fruit and coconut milk, as you lounge in the sun and relax to the sound of the waves, the whole time wondering 'why did I ever take that cheating [censored] as my wife in the first place, and why did I ever decide to live in such a cold, awful place like skyrim in the first place?".

» Thu Jun 21, 2012 5:16 pm

same thing happened to me. I entered breezehome and he was inside. muttered something about how she would be his. She greeted me with "good day my love, back from some adventure I bet."

I invited him to come along on my next adventure and I took him to a shrine, made him touch it and then I killed him as sacrifice to the cult.

Problem solved.

» Fri Jun 22, 2012 5:42 am

Nice wish i could do that to aerin. Theres always the dark brotherdood!

Dragonborn: "Sweet Mother, sweet Mother, send your child unto me, for the sins of the unworthy must be baptized in blood and fear."
-2 Days Later-
Night Mother: "There is a contract to kill Aerin of Riften. He usually is hanging out with Mjoll."
Dragonborn: "Im on it!"

» Thu Jun 21, 2012 11:09 pm

Kill them both and then go hide in the mountains with a real woman like Angi who can smith and shoot a torchbug off of a fox's rear.

» Fri Jun 22, 2012 5:57 am

naughty , naughty , SOMEBODY hasn't got a good half-dozen "potion of vigour" stashed under the bed or stuffed in the bedside basket to satisfy the 'wifes appetite for .....polishing

» Thu Jun 21, 2012 2:55 pm

Do what any sane person would do.Kill fendal. Take a massive life insurance policy on camilla, kill her, fake your own death after laundering the cash, and live the rest of your days out on a warm tropical island off the coast of valenwood, with hot woodelf bikini girls feeding you fruit and coconut milk, as you lounge in the sun and relax to the sound of the waves, the whole time wondering 'why did I ever take that cheating [censored] as my wife in the first place, and why did I ever decide to live in such a cold, awful place like skyrim in the first place?".

LOL I remember faking my death in Oblivion with Skull of Corruption, too bad you can't do it in Skyrim.

» Thu Jun 21, 2012 5:53 pm

you need to kill him in front of ur wife to assert your dominace

» Fri Jun 22, 2012 12:21 am

I tea baged him in his sleep... That was not assertive enough. I need to dominate him... advlt TOY MODS HERE I COME!

» Thu Jun 21, 2012 7:19 pm

Kill him, in front of your wife if you can, and make sure that it's with a satisfying finisher.

» Fri Jun 22, 2012 1:37 am

Do what any sane person would do.Kill fendal. Take a massive life insurance policy on camilla, kill her, fake your own death after laundering the cash, and live the rest of your days out on a warm tropical island off the coast of valenwood, with hot woodelf bikini girls feeding you fruit and coconut milk, as you lounge in the sun and relax to the sound of the waves, the whole time wondering 'why did I ever take that cheating [censored] as my wife in the first place, and why did I ever decide to live in such a cold, awful place like skyrim in the first place?".

this post was great!

» Fri Jun 22, 2012 6:54 am

this post was great!

there's more ways to dominate than murdering people , but then , this IS skyrim *sigh*

» Thu Jun 21, 2012 3:25 pm

You must sacrifice him to the prince-of-plots Boet-Hi-Ah!!!!!

» Thu Jun 21, 2012 2:54 pm

Yes the elf never gives up. My first character was married to her. I ended up killing him and leaving him naked in a falmer cave. Problem solved.

No sorry baby I tried to save him; but he jumped in front of an arrow aimed at my back.

» Fri Jun 22, 2012 4:59 am

is it bad that I now want this to happen to my character? XD Or we can all get the "Nice Boat" ending with him.....V cookies for anyone who gets the referance.

naughty , naughty , SOMEBODY hasn't got a good half-dozen "potion of vigour" stashed under the bed or stuffed in the bedside basket to satisfy the 'wifes appetite for .....polishing

I am sorry but that was just stupid and childish thing to post :/

» Fri Jun 22, 2012 2:14 am

is it bad that I now want this to happen to my character? XD Or we can all get the "Nice Boat" ending with him.....V cookies for anyone who gets the referance.

I am sorry but that was just stupid and childish thing to post :/

no offence my dear , but that's a bit rich coming from you

» Fri Jun 22, 2012 1:24 am

I still find postings like this thread extremely disturbing. That whole "my wife can't be trusted to be alone with another guy" thing is what I'd expect from some Taliban perhaps, but not from people predominantly from the western hemisphere.

Anyway. This is why you need to solve the Love Triangle quest by giving Camilla both letters and telling her the truth about the sinister plans and plots of both dudes. Whoever of them you speak to first after that will still be a loyal follower, no matter that they won't be able to score with Camilla any more.

» Fri Jun 22, 2012 4:01 am

I still find postings like this thread extremely disturbing. That whole "my wife can't be trusted to be alone with another guy" thing is what I'd expect from some Taliban perhaps, but not from people predominantly from the western hemisphere.

I'm not trying to undermine your point, because i agree that its a weird thing to post about, particularly when its over a game, but you'll probably find that far more people cheat on their partners in the western hemisphere then they do in middle eastern areas that you're referring to.

» Fri Jun 22, 2012 2:23 am

its a little unnerving when i come home to my wife and another guy together all the time. After all I deserve it, I leave her alone for months at a time. But im still a beast in bed! Though its hard to get any sleep.

» Thu Jun 21, 2012 6:41 pm

My first guess would be this is a PC thing? After further reading I concluded that this is possible even on the Xbox 360? Other than all that, this is one funny thread. I have always loved Faendal in this game, but if he ever pulled that on me, I'm afraid he would have to go!

» Fri Jun 22, 2012 6:30 am

I still find postings like this thread extremely disturbing. That whole "my wife can't be trusted to be alone with another guy" thing is what I'd expect from some Taliban perhaps, but not from people predominantly from the western hemisphere.

Anyway. This is why you need to solve the Love Triangle quest by giving Camilla both letters and telling her the truth about the sinister plans and plots of both dudes. Whoever of them you speak to first after that will still be a loyal follower, no matter that they won't be able to score with Camilla any more.

you just went full [censored]. Never go full [censored].

» Thu Jun 21, 2012 10:48 pm

ok , the whole "taliban" thing is a bit OTT , now if you ask me , i love this kind of thread , they are funny , simple and slight sixually oriented , which allows for a whole vat of "ya mum" jokes

if you dont like it! - dont post!

back to thread : if she keeps n doing this , its time for extreme action! first , beat your wife at regular intervals , second make her wear a helmet and robes that cover ALL SKIN completely , third make her follow your religion vigorously , finally 4 : kill faendal

- my excellent "eastern ""hemisphere"" " advice!!