» Sun May 13, 2012 3:57 am
Before you even start, you need to make sure that you look presentable. Buy a good suit, get a good haircut and then write a speech about how awesome you are. Also, get a key, seriously, you need a key.
Step two, pick a few places that you'd like to work and research them, try being realistic and picking a smaller company that you're going to have a chance at working at, don't try this with Microsoft or Apple. Also, you mentioned that you don't have a car so try and pick somewhere nearby. Once you've chosen a few places, research the owners and whoever's going to be interviewing you, you need to find out what sort of people they are. If they got a great education and dozens of degrees then you might as well try somewhere else because they'll probably hold your lack of skills and experience against you, but if they, like you, started with practically nothing and worked their way up then you might have more of a chance. Adjust your awesome speech to make it sound like you're exactly the sort of person that they would like working for them.
Step three is that you need to make a good first impression, comb your hair, put on your suit, go in first thing on Monday morning and bring gifts for everyone, nobody likes Mondays, so a random kid walking in with beer and food is definitely going to impress them. Once you've cheered up whoever's working at the front desk tell them that you want to spend a few minutes talking to whoever's in charge. If they ask why, tell them that you're looking for a job, it's a good thing that you don't have a CV because they'll probably ask for one and even if you did have one you wouldn't give it to them because you don't want them to see how empty it is. They probably won't ask you to leave, because they want to know who you are, after all they're going to be thinking "Who the [censored] is this kid?", because let's be honest, it's not every day that EpicFail walks into your office with his arms full of pasties. Don't leave without sorting something out, if you can't see the manager now, arrange an interview, if the manager is available then make you sure you see him. Once you get to the manager, shake his hand, give him your speech, and then tell him that you want to work for a month, for free. Basically convince him that you’re full of [censored] but willing to work your nuts off for a month for absolutely nothing. If he says no, thank him for his time and repeat the process at one of the other companies that you researched. If he says yes, come in everyday and work as hard as you can for the next month. When the month is up, talk to him again, if you've impressed him, you get the job. If not, you go to one of the other companies that you researched and try again.