Yeah, I learned that the hard way. I thought I could throw myself in the FZ, and then from there launch my way up. It was later I learned you get dumped in the FZ, not promoted there

Unfortunately. But such is life

meh... friends are overrated. girlfriends however, are underrated! and nope never been is this "friend zone" you speak of. i have been straight up dumped though of course.

Friends are overrated? I highly doubt you mean that.

nope i mean it. i can never find the right type per se. i dont fit into any stereotype group, and im not trusting of people(or myself, you know how nature is). ive had many different types of friends and girlfriends, but i didnt trust a single one of em. maybe one day ill find a great friend but atm its associates...my girlfriend is my only friend really but i still dont trust her.

The myth is that women are not attracted to men they see as friends, because they see them as friends. Hence, a man sees getting "put in the friend zone" as having disqualified him from a sixual relationship he otherwise would have had, when in truth, he never had a chance in the first place. That is the belief that some of the people in this thread are calling a myth. If a woman finds a male friend romantically appealing, she would not hesitate to take take that relationship to the next level if the feelings were mutual.

If she doesn't want to take it to the next level, it's because she doesn't find her male friend romantically appealing, and likely never did. Men use the "friend zone" to shield themselves from this uncomfortable truth, to say, "She rejected me because she sees me as a friend," rather than, "She rejected me because she thinks I'm unattractive." I suppose some women may do, too, but I've only ever heard these kinds of complaints from men.

now i think of it i put a few girls in the friend zone before. of course many men have, its just rarer because many men take whatever comes at them because six is high priority. or the girl ends up in the friend zone after they have had there way with them.

That Friend Zone Level 99 image was downright hilarious.

Thankfully I've never been friend zoned, likely too careful who I extend myself to as far as relationships are concerned and I avoided dating scenes. Looking at these images it must svck for those who have but almost every story I hear of someone being friend zoned I find funny.

'

I was never one to chicken out in such things in life


Yeah, I don't think I could stay as friends with her (she's head over heels for some other guy). svcks though, she was among my best buddies for the past year or so, talked about everything and anything, it was something out of a corny novel or something. Parting ways so abruptly will hurt, but hey, [censored] svcks, but what am I gonna do? It hurts, but that's life, let's see what tomorrow brings

Btw, I know that post sounded happy and stuff, but believe me folks, I am writhing in sorrow and pain inside...Skyrim isn't even working right so I can kill time, jeez.

Forever beta.

ha ha ha what a mug! poor boy....

I've felt like I was in the friend zone before, but really that was just me never making a move. And I've friend zoned someone else before. But that didn't work out and just kind of ended the friendship (luckily it wasn't an awesome one to begin with). And I'm in a relationship with my best friend currently. So, I guess I'm not really too familiar with the friend zone. It's either: not making a move on your part, it doesn't work out and the two of you stop talking, or it does and you happily date.

What I've found with most of the girls I've been around is that there is this window of time after you meet them where they might start considering you as a "more than a friend" prospect. You don't always have to ask them out, per se, and you can even hang out together if it's in mixed groups of friends, as long as you start getting some chemistry going and building a relationship.

But then, after a while, if you don't make a move, they just assume you're a naturally nice gup and are like that with everyone, and then they move on and start thinking of looking at other people.

While timing is always important, better to be up front about it when you realize that you're interested in her, rather than waiting around to break it to her slowly.

Just stuff like "hey, let's hang out some time, just me and you" should be enough of a hint for most people to get that you'd like to get to know them, well, one on one.

And then you build from there over time.

Or she tells you right then and there, "not interested". And then you move on and don't get stuck anywhere.

It's possible to get out of the friend zone. Buuuuuut it's kind of an up hill battle. I did it once, and the first week or two we started to go out she was always giving me these weird looks. She just never thought of me in a romantic way, and never thought of me making a move (she told me later). But then she got me changed around in her mind as a guy who was "just a friend" to a guy who was "more than just a friend".

Be aware of what happens when a girl gets you in her mind as one thing or another. Sometimes, if they think of you as a friend, they literally just never think of you in any other way. If you make a move, they'll start thinking of you in other ways, and that can turn into her wanting to build a romantic relationship.

I just got out of a situation that has....similarities to this. Well, at least that's how I thought it would turn out. Basically, I met this girl at registration day for college back in May that I immediatley hit it off with. We added each other on facebook and kept in touch before school started. I crushed on her over all of summer, and even sent her a message telling her I liked her. She kind of hinted that we may end up being a couple and said "nobody knows the scope of the future, eh?" The more we talked, the more we kind of grew on each other. She even went so far as to say "I like you, friend! I'm gonna give you a big hug when I see you for the first time again!"

Sounds awesome, right? [censored] wrong! Right before school started, she got a new boyfriend- an entire STATE AWAY. I, of course, felt crushed and basically thought to myself, "FML. I just got my hopes up all summer for absolutely nothing. Now I'm going to be friend-zoned and love her secretly but can never say anything because she has a boyfriend." Well, I was right and wrong. Turns out she ended up REALLY liking me when we met again in person. We turned out to be dearest of companions and ended up having six basically every single day...and she never broke up with her long-distance boyfriend because she's just soooo in love with him.

After returning from Christmas break, I just told her I didn't want to see her anymore. I just couldn't take the whole "two lover" garbage anymore. The only reason I put up with it for so long was because I was getting laid every day. Really svcks, though. She loved me and I really loved her for basically everything except that....but I just can't do stuff with her anymore. Even if she broke up with her boyfriend, then what? I date her and constantly worry about her cheating on me and lying to me about it for months? Not gonna happen. Sure svcks that she's an amazing person besides, you know, being a lying and cheating [censored].

The funny part? I still think this is miles better than being completely friend zoned. That would svck and am just thankful that's never happened to me. I already started talking to her again because we are actually close, but it just isn't the same... *sigh* Sure svcks for her boyfriend, though. XD Poor bastard doesn't know about any of this. I'd have told him a long time ago if it didn't mean her whole social life and repuation being ruined. She sure is lucky I actually care about her becauseI really want to tell him.

Most of my closest friends are girls, my life is one giant friend zone and it svcks sometimes but at the end of the day I'm just glad to have so many great friends

I find having the " I really like you " discussion is the ultimate game killer. Tried it and failed many times.

Getting drunk and going for the make out seemed to improve my hook up successes. Even if you wake up and she tells you " I don't really like you like that, this is a one time thing, " at least you got one night of action. And even if you get denied, you get an answer to your question without the awkward conversation.

I feel actions are more effective than words in such situations.

This is a very common post, OP. Many guys who use the friendship angle to get an "in" with the girl then get mired in a tangle of their own feelings: their feelings build and build during the "friendship", and they start to feel that if they make a move, they might lose everything they've invested. The posts usually include "so much at stake", or "don't want to lose the friendship".
Realize that the primary reason you are friends with her in the first place is because you wanted her. If you do nothing, you will get nothing. If you do something, and she doesn't feel the same, you will actually have lost nothing ... because nothing was there in the first place. And you'll actually have gained a lot, because although you'll probably be very disappointed, you won't be left wondering forever what could have happened if you had just done something. Which is worse: finding out for sure, or being paralyzed forever, never knowing? The latter lasts a very long time, and hurts far more. You'll kick yourself constantly.
So man up and ask her out on a date.

This is actually very solid advice. You don't have to come right out and say "I WUV YOU PLZ DATZ ME", but once you feel the time is right start asking to hang out with her one-on-one. Its much easier to find out this way that shes not interested in you, then to completely throw yourself out there and have no one to catch your fall.


This is also very solid advice.

that's sad actually. you shouldn't stop looking though, having a real friend is something you'll be grateful for.

I just realized, why hasn't this http://xkcd.com/513/ been posted yet?

Good point.

this, when I started being more honest about what I really want it just stopped being a problem.

Breaking her will? I have no idea what you mean by that. Please elaborate.

That is exactly what I'm saying.

That happened to my friend and my other friend. He desided to tell her how he felt and she gave the "we are just friends" speech. I've never told any (of the two) girl(s) how I felt/feel, because my covardness protects me from hurting myself if they say F* off google-eye.

Ask her out on a date anyway? Even after hearing the whole speech, you mean?