does anyone out their know a way?

Finish the join quest (little boy in windhelm)
Kill the brotherhood member who tries to induct you and the quest begins.

Do the quest to start with them, where you kill the lady at thee orphanage. Then when your wind up captive with the DB chick refuse to kill anyone and kilo her instead. Then talk to the guard captain in solitude to get thee quest to destroy the Db

Steal their contract by doing "Innocence Lost" then go to sleep. You'll wake up in a shack and instructed to kill one of the three prisoners. Kill Astrid instead and it will begin the quest to end them.

DON'T DESTROY THEM! Trust me Shadowmere is well worth the 12 murders you have to have on your stats. I completed thier entire quest line and only ended up with the 1500 bounty in Solitude (which cannot be avoided) and gladly paid it and went about my way. I now have the best horse in the game....3 times the health, actually fights and doesn't run, and regenerates his health 2 times as fast. He is almost impossible to kill. I mean he can die, but it is hard to have him die.

For roleplay reasons, I can understand why someone would want to destroy them. Some people are playing characters they've dedicated to being good, not evil.

Dangit... only now I read this!

Well, more to the replay value of Skyrim I guess

The reason I would join:
To see them utterly demolished at the hands of the Empire, the Old Mage: "I used to be part of the dark brother hood...but then I took an ARROW ALL OVER THE PLACE!"

The Dark Brotherhood is fairly easy to exterminate. The gold you get is worth it.

You get triple the amount of gold if you help them, you get an invincible demon horse, you get an entire free house, and you get LUCIEN FREAKING LACHANCE as a summon. 3000 is nothing compared to that.

Also the little vampire girl is one of the few NPCs in the game that sells Daedra Hearts.

On the flip side, if you choose to destroy the Dark Brotherhood you can get the Blade of Woe immediately by looting it off of Astrid and you can also loot the Scimitar and Redguard outfit from Nazir.

Uhm... yes it can. I did the entire DB quest line without a bounty. You simply sneak mode at the top of the castle where you drop the mount. Drop it, then stay in sneak mode till they cant detect you. Then you fast travel away...

I ended with a 40 bounty in solitude. =)

Don't forget the immense rewards for electing to become the DB Guild Master. If you do, you'll get :

1) an infinite supply of DB acolytes to accompnay you as followers around Skyrim. These guys come in real handy for helping out in the other side/miscellaenous quests, and especially in the Daedric quests (some of which require you to sacrifice someone).

2) Cierco as your new "frenemy". Consider keeping the Village Fool around for fun and giggles later. He also comes in real handy as a follower in a certain Daedric quest

3) your personal atm aka DB torture chamber where you can intimidate innocent victims into telling you where their money and loot is stashed. Real handy if you're at the lower levels early in game and could use lots of cash up front.

4) make gold from contracts directly given to you by the night mother as her new listener

5) an additional home to store your loot (a huge master bedroom with some special equipment for being the Nightmother's new top lieutenant)

6) And oh yes, the final DB quest toward becoming the DB master gives you a mere 20,000 gp for completeing the optional questline. And that's on top of the other leveled treasure/rewards you get toward becoming the DB master

Oh well. I had over 160% sneak, had drank a potion of invisiblity, and was in the hall with the door closed when the idiot ate the soup. A 1500 bounty was instantly issued even though no one saw me. Again oh well....I paid it, spent no time in jail, and got away with it MUHAHAHAHAHAHA!

I destroyed them because i was sick of gettin ambushed while travelling along the roads....now i just get attacked by a random race

Shadowmere is cool and all, but can be really annoying when I want to be stealthy.
Is there a way to dismiss the horse?
Reloading a save before the DB and choosing to kill them instead seems like such a hassle to get out of the situation I'm currently stuck in.

I didnt even know of this! Too much replay value! AAAArrrrgh! I love it!

Do you let the rewards of quests influence you?

Me, I have never forgiven Astrid for calling me a "poor fool" on the contract. I'll show them who the poor fools really are.

No, I'm not for that stuff.

That 1500 bounty can be avoided. It's hard and I did like 10 reloads but I finally got away without any bounty. I had to find a spot where I wasn't spotted. Shot an arrow. Before the arrow hit I used an invis potion and ran the hell out of there before anyone noticed me. Once I got out of the city gates the guards outside didn't do anything to me and after a couple days I returned and even talked to one of the guards and he just did that sweet roll comment to me. My char is mainly a mage and I didn't have any points in sneak either. The location to snipe her is hard to find and people do look at you every so often while there so the timing has to be perfect.

Yes.

I killed Astrid the moment I encountered her... ran into some guard in a town who was like "Oh, well then just go to X and finish them off", which I did.

Not much of a brotherhood. They lasted all of 2 minutes.

Lucien would have had that Group of Brotherhood cleansed the moment he set foot in there. lmao