Alrighty then!***Dragging the hapless Eldritch Moe behind him by the sleeve, Seta entered The Black Goat Bar. Walking up to the bar, he greeted the barkeep with a "Howdy! I'd like a tall glass of Moondog Dunkel for me and my friend Moe here."With a sneer of amused contempt, the barkeep poured unfiltered, lumpy beer from the manically wheezing tap into two dull, misshapen glasses that looked as if they were made of transparent wax that had been sitting in the sun too long. Grinning obtusely, Seta happily paid for the beers, handed Eldritch Moe one of the glasses and eyed his own beer excitedly."Hey, this is... Um, novel. It's got little glowy green flecks swimming around in it! And it smells... Er, different. Oh well, CHEERS!"

Cheers, or as the upper class here in Finland says, "Perseet olalle!" - Jari TervoThe Unnamable watches the green glowing flecks for a moment.The Unnamable: Well, i was hungry anyway.The Unnamable immidiately drinks the whole pintful, then passes out.Seta: Oh well, more chicks left here for me, then.Seta goes to get some chicks. The place was full of people, but everyone kinda seemed to look away when Seta looked at them.Then Seta heard a soft voice singing. He couldn't be sure, but it sounded something like this: "Ia-R'lyehl Cihuiha flgagnl id Ia!"To Seta, it was the most beautiful voice he had ever heard. He went to the youg, slender, beautifully featured girl. Her skin was greyish-green, she had big bulging eyes, really deep ones. Seta winked at her (that's "winked" with an 'i'). The girl smiled a little, but didn't wink back. It was the most beautiful female Seta had ever seen.Seta: How are you doin'... The girl: hihihihihiSeta: So, what's you're name... (winks at her)The girl: hihihihiihhihhi... My name is Uxia... hihihiihiihihi...Curiously, Seta noted, Uxia would have seemed to like him, except she never winked back...Seta: Hey, you want me to by you a beer...Uxia: hihihihiiiihhhiii.. Sure... hihihihhihihiii....Seta goes to order another two beers and Uxia follows. The smell of beer wakes up The Unnamable, who was just on the stool next to them.The Unnamable: I just saw the most horrible nightmare: i had woken up from an asylum 20 years after seeing the most horrible spoiler, only to find out that DCotE for PC still hadn't been released... Thank Nodens it was just a dream...The unnamable notices Uxia.The Unnamable: Hey, who's that?Seta: She's Uxia, one of the locals.The Unnamable: Hi, Uxia!Uxia: I?! I?! Shub-Niggurath!To the Unnamable, that was the most beautiful voice he had ever heard. It was the most beautiful female The Unnamable had ever seen.Seta: Moe... Moe, are you allright?The Unnamable: Need to have a sh!te!The Unnamable goes to have a sh!te on the men's room.DON'T MISS OUR NEXT EPISODE OF "HOLD ME, I'M SCARED.": THE SMELL OF FEAR OR NEW PROMETHEUS. THE BETRAYAL... THE SATISFACTION... THE DUEL...

Oh god...lol

I cant live up to this!! And why the hurry!??!WHATS GOING ON?!!?!

What th--What's happened to your SIG??!I'm trying to push the story along because we're spending great amounts of the board on a non-Dark Corners topic which, methinks, is kinda self-indulgent. I'm also keen not to leave it so it wanders away without an ending...So: Shotgun and significantly angry populace added for dramatic tension!=) --RoB

Well, if it wasn't you then who could it have been?...Oh, irony, I get it.C'mere, you...! --RoB

What exactly is going on in this thread?

INFORMATIVE ANSWER: People were posting about how good it was to get the XBox version of Dark Corners and then two PC 'waiters' made a joke about going into the future to get a copy each for the PC. The posts started to bounce around into a kind of Fear and Loathing in Innsmouth meets Evil Dead script, due mainly to the inflated posting style of one Reverend Speed.HONEST ANSWER: I don't know, but it won't stop. --RoB

Well - this is very funny and all but I'm writing far too much on it, plus it has little to do with Dark Corners. Methinks I'll stop responding to posts here and we'll see if we can't all ignore it out of existance... it'll be for the best!Bye all. --RoB

Go pay a visit to the Stupid Thread, your talents shall serve it well.(No offense intended)

Ha! He'll come back. He always does...

He better! He still owes me a beer!

Al, Eldritch Moe, Rev Speed, and any other who have wondered where Moondog Dunkel came from, listen to THIS:"http://www.neilgaiman.com/audio/audio/cbldf_american_gods.mp3", read aloud by its author Neil Gaiman.As the title suggests, it's a Lovecraft Mythos inspired story.Check it out, it's delightfully funny!

It is a wonderful story, and even better hearing read by Neil Gaiman!http://www.neilgaiman.com/exclusive/essay07.aspalso by Neil Gaiman

Yes, it's very... squamous.And "I Cthulhu" is great!

Squamous for those that are not sure means Scaly or of scale like appearance(rats have squamous tails)

That's what i love about Cthulhu forums, you always learn something new.I'm still wondering though where does the name "Eldritch Moe" come from.

Seta was right. Nothing beats this thread!You could paste some watery dirt and uaginal fluids and beat it with a spatula but it would still stand proud!

Right.Hideous twist time.So it's Christmas and my friends and I are exchanging gifts and they give me a FUKIN' XBOX.This is surprising, no?So now I'm trying to get my TV in working and, well...You know they got it for me EXPRESSLY to shut me up about a game I've been gabbering on about for six years?It may be wrong, but I like it.Okay so... dammit, I'll continue the story. As soon as I get a net connection. But now... can you entirely trust Reverend Speed?Ooo. --RoB

So it really does pay to b!tch and whine? PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE TELL ME WHEN IS THE PC VERSION RELEASED HEADFIRST/BETHESDA/CTHULHU????++!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111

Speed is back! I demand a welcome party, Seta!! You brin the moondog dunkel, The Unnamable you keep an eye on him so he doesnt drink it himself, and me? I already called the girls and Im repairing the time machine right up!

Be assured that my friends have all been thoroughly Dunkled - but gently, as they're delicate. It is worth it though - that fine, full-bodied richness that is Moondog - for the few seconds before you lose your tastebuds.Tried buying the game today - Dublin, Ireland for the latecomers. No Game branch in the city centre has a copy of the game. Tried Smiths."No, sorry, never heard of it."So I'm alarming fellow shoppers by trailing a sea of brain foam from my ears as I head into Game Stop, Henry St."Wha?"No, you must have it. You had copies a few months ago. You must."Wha, mister? Oi nevers heard of dah game."They can't even find it on their systems. Morons.This is, at present, fukin' rediculous. We're one shop away from entering the dark underbelly of obscuro Dublin gaming shops, we're not too far away from saying Very Bad Things about Bethesda on these forums when...Gamestop, Haepenny Bridge. Do you have Call of Cthulhu: Dark Corners of--"Oh, THAT'S how you pronounce it!"I am made to live out one of my own scripts, but in reverse. They have one copy left... preowned.Dudes. This is Not Good. Where are our Christmas sales to bring forward the PC version?Anyway.Going home to set up my X-Box (I own an X-Box... how weird is that? My first console, too...). Going home to fight with my tempermental TV-in.I'll post a very short first impressions review here tonight if time and technical expertise permits.And then I'm right back to campaigning for my PC version.Christ. THOSE WERE ALL THE HIGHSTREET DEDICATED GAMING STORES IN DUBLIN! GRRRNGH! --RoBPS: Alfred - the trip is going to happen. Yesssssssss... but first I need a stable internet connection. Will nobody continue the story before me? Will no-one help the widow's son? I'm not a Mason, by the way.

Oh no, did everybody die?

Quick Seta, you are the last of the Four, you must pass on the Secret before they get you too!

Mumble... mutter... frickin' no internet connection.DARBA MUST HAVE MOONDOG! --RoBPS: I have such hideous puns planned. Such. Hideous. Puns.