Fallout: New Vegas Joke Thread

Post » Tue May 10, 2011 4:24 pm

There once was a man named Raul,
Kidnapped by a nightkin; uncool,
But Tabi got hot,
When I fragged her bot,
Now she's a sticky green pool.
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ashleigh bryden
 
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Post » Wed May 11, 2011 3:53 am

HAHAHAHA :rofl:


indeed
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Nathan Risch
 
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Post » Tue May 10, 2011 5:20 pm

Courier: Caesar, I'm afraid I have bad news for you.
Caesar: What is it?
Courier: I'm afraid you have TUMOR days to live.

Oh how I love cheesy puns :laugh:
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jennie xhx
 
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Post » Tue May 10, 2011 11:48 pm

This little girl came to my house yesterday saying she was a Camp Searchlight victim, and she was collecting money to rebuild her shattered community.

I knew straight away she was a scam artist and sent her packing with her tail between her legs!

bdum bum
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Charleigh Anderson
 
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Post » Tue May 10, 2011 11:21 am

heh, i like Camp Searchlight jokes, radiation sickness equals comedy gold!

*******

As a devoted, hard-working NCR Soldier from Camp Searchlight, I can count on one hand the number of times I have been absent from work in the past 10 years.

8 times.


*******
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Del Arte
 
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Post » Tue May 10, 2011 7:04 pm

I just listened to the final episode of "Camp Searchlight's Got Talent" on Radio New Vegas. I gave it 3 thumbs up. *





*kind of like previous joke, but still a knee slapper
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Rex Help
 
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Post » Wed May 11, 2011 3:39 am

ok, one more bad one:



radioactive cats have 18 half-lives



hur dur
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Claire Vaux
 
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Post » Wed May 11, 2011 2:10 am

Dear God, learn to edit jokes into one post Fritoz :bonk:
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Gemma Flanagan
 
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Post » Tue May 10, 2011 12:02 pm

Why did the courier photograph the ghoul?

His smile was radiant.
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Music Show
 
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Post » Wed May 11, 2011 12:18 am

Dear God, learn to edit jokes into one post Fritoz :bonk:



really? that bothered you?


heh, that made me laugh more than any of the jokes i'd read!
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Stu Clarke
 
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Post » Wed May 11, 2011 3:01 am

this one is just for Colonel Martyr:

The NCR is having a meeting to evaluate their options with the newly aquired territories around New Vegas.
The last subject of the day: Unused land around Camp Searchlight.
The discussion goes up in flames: We could grow crops... No, it's poisonous. We could raise cattle... No, the cattle will die immediately.
But, at last, one man expresses his opinion: Why not raise tobacco? Then we can put a sign on cigarette packages that says "The health department warns you, for the last time dammit, smoking is bad for your health."


:P
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Adrian Powers
 
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Post » Wed May 11, 2011 1:56 am

this one is just for Colonel Martyr:

The NCR is having a meeting to evaluate their options with the newly aquired territories around New Vegas.
The last subject of the day: Unused land around Camp Searchlight.
The discussion goes up in flames: We could grow crops... No, it's poisonous. We could raise cattle... No, the cattle will die immediately.
But, at last, one man expresses his opinion: Why not raise tobacco? Then we can put a sign on cigarette packages that says "The health department warns you, for the last time dammit, smoking is bad for your health."


:P


:unsure2: :confused:
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Kayla Bee
 
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Post » Tue May 10, 2011 6:26 pm

I don't really get the last joke. :confused:
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remi lasisi
 
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Post » Wed May 11, 2011 2:55 am

Random Person: Why does that floating robot follow you everywhere?
Courier: He give me psychic powers
Random Person: Really?
Courier: Yeah. They are really extra sensory

I think you stole my pun,
I said this:
"When your siding with the NCR and fight at Hoover Dam, you say to the opposing forces (not trying to post a spoiler) "Dam" Bridge Assualt!"


His was better :P
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Camden Unglesbee
 
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Post » Tue May 10, 2011 3:27 pm

How many ghouls does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

None, they glow
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Invasion's
 
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Post » Tue May 10, 2011 11:06 pm

ah you guys crack me up heh heh

not a joke:
great thing about the internet is i can never tell if they are teenagers in their parents basemants or really old dudes in their parents basemant...


:)
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Travis
 
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Post » Tue May 10, 2011 1:54 pm

Courier: Caesar, I'm afraid I have bad news for you.
Caesar: What is it?
Courier: I'm afraid you have TUMOR days to live.

Oh how I love cheesy puns :laugh:


Arnold Schwarzenegger: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OaTO8_KNcuo
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Hearts
 
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Post » Wed May 11, 2011 2:57 am

ah you guys crack me up heh heh

not a joke:
great thing about the internet is i can never tell if they are teenagers in their parents basemants or really old dudes in their parents basemant...


:)


I'm an older dude in your basemant. Bring me down some nachos, would ya?
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Emily abigail Villarreal
 
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Post » Wed May 11, 2011 2:17 am

Arnold Schwarzenegger: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OaTO8_KNcuo


BRING YOUR TOY BACH TO ZE CAAHPET!
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Kaley X
 
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Post » Tue May 10, 2011 5:39 pm

Q- Why did the Fiend run home in a hurry?

A- Because he heard the Dinner Bell.
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Raymond J. Ramirez
 
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Post » Tue May 10, 2011 3:06 pm

What's the difference between a Fiend and a stray dog? They both bark incomprehensibly, they both live in squalor, they are both abandoned by the rest of their kind. But only one is still edible.

:mellow: Uh. I'm not.. uh.



Hmm? :D
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Kelsey Hall
 
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Post » Wed May 11, 2011 12:22 am

How many ghouls does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

None, they glow

Or:
2. But how'd they get IN the lightbulb? And dear GOD would they please stop doing that where I can see it??? I'm gonna be sick! Grrblllfffhhhhh
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Pixie
 
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Post » Wed May 11, 2011 2:11 am

really? that bothered you?


heh, that made me laugh more than any of the jokes i'd read!


But the post.. They are multiple!

@Momaw: You had me there.
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pinar
 
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Post » Wed May 11, 2011 2:16 am

I don't really get the last joke. :confused:

The last joke hasn't been posted yet :hubbahubba:
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Brittany Abner
 
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Post » Tue May 10, 2011 10:02 pm

PATROLLING THE NUCLEAR WINTER MAKES YOU WISH FOR A MOJAVE!!!! :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :flame: :flame: :brokencomputer:

Mojave?

Mo Problem!
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Krystal Wilson
 
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