I don't care one way or the other in regards to being able to make a trans-gendered character or to be able to have multiple partners, but I assume that most people want more options in every aspect of the game because it is, as you said, a role-playing game. That means you make a character and roleplay how you want. The fact that you can't do certain things that would be trivial to add (as mods do it easily) is what gets people worked up
And those people are generally stupid people. At some point, not EVERY single option ANYONE can think up can be catered for, yet so many people seem to think that the option THEY thought of is the definitive must have for the game. The crucial missing option that ruins the game.
I mean... I wanted to play "Unfgar the nvde", who ran around, well, quite naked, and beating people with dead, raw chickens. Despite the unparallelled awesomeness that would be provided by my character vigorously beating a Draugr into submission with a rapidly disintegrating chicken carcass, the developers, in what was obviously an oversight that will be fixed in the next patch,
did not include this option! Words cannot express my disappointment upon opening the game, running excitedly into Riverwood, slaughtering the first chicken I saw, and then only being able to select food portions from it. No use as a weapon whatsoever. I was beyond crushed.
If it's not fixed in the next patch, I'm at least hoping they bring the idea on board for TESVI.