The fur in the ears comment is stupid. It almost always occurs when you are wearing a helmet or hood. When no one can see your ears.
Especially stupid when said to a kad'jitt or argonian.

As lame as the arrow to the knee comments are, you have to admit they have kind of become part of the skyrim fan culture. It makes for a lot of great jokes. Heck, on youtube a guy made a video where he went on a guard killing spree with a bow and shot each one of them in the knees. I do hate the sweetroll comments, and how a lot of the guards sounds like Arnold Schwarzenegger.

Hate to be that person but... "stupidest" isn't a word.. unless I'm mistaken?

Uh, but for me, it has to be when they comment stuff like "Is that..fur?.. coming out of your ear?" , even when you've cured yourself of lycanthropy.

You've never met Mariah of Stros M'kai.

I can't stand it when I'm walking around and everyone is commenting "They say the dragons have returned!"

Dude... I already I am f**king dragonborn how could you not be sure if dragons have returned! They're all over the place!

lol

I definitely find it to be a snide remark.

"Dialog triggers? What's that?"
-Bethesda

How are you "dumping the bodies in the graveyard"? Or "dragging a body"? Must be missing something here, I think.

I think the guards says alot of stupid things, but the one bothering me the most is the "Let me guess, someone stole your sweetroll?"

Don't mind me, I'll just take this carrot and shove it down your throat.

Guard: "No matter what else happens, the guards will always be grateful for everything you've done!"

Me: "Oh, thank you!"

Guard: "I find your hand in my pocket, I'm going to cut it off!"

Me: Eh, what ...? Didn't you just ...

Guard: "I trust the day's found you well, thane."

Me: Sure, sure, until you ...

Guard: "Now, I know who you are. And... and I know your business... Just, please... These are good folk we got here. Mostly..."

Me: Ah, that's better, some respect, don't worry, I'm not gonna ...

Guard: "Don't cross me, Elf."

Me: You know who I am and still ...? Ok, that's it!

Guard: "You come up to me, fists raised? You looking for a beating?"

Me: Ok, ok, I guess I can't kill you, I'm thane afterall, let's hand forget this ever happened.

Guard: "Don't cross me, Elf."

Me: "You're seriously trying your luck here, mate!"

Guard: "Disrespect the law, you disrespect me."

Me: Just BLEEP off, I'm leaving!

Guard: "No lollygaggin'."

*I pull out my sword*

Guard: "Aye, now that there's a beautiful sword. Like a sliver of midnight. Takes a fair bit of strength to carry a greatsword like that. But can you use it?"

Me: "Yes. Yes, I can"

Dammit!

Drag them the same way you move any object. Klick, hold the button a little longer than usual, then move (but slowly, they are easy to drop. And you can't move between cells if you're on console). Klick again to drop.

I was in Falkreath when this happened, and since that place has a graveyard, I thought it would be appropriate to drag them there.

After i finished kill the dark brotherhood quest a solitude guard said: You know, I could have gone into that Sanctuary, killed all those Dark Brotherhood types. But I was... sick that day. I guess this guard took an arrow in the knee that day.

I once met a guard who said he was a hero. Until he took an arrow to the knee

I like the "steen sef, aho?" line

Yeah but that's not the reason is it though. It's simply a mistake like a whole bunch of other guard quotes.

He's not complaining, he's telling you how he became a guard.

Sergeant: "You have any combat experience?"
Applicant: "Yes, been wandering Skyrim for years, killed one of just about everything out there."
Sergeant: "Good, good. Can you stand in one place for months on end, with no food, drink, biological breaks?"
Applicant: "Oh, yes, I'm a veritable statue."
Sergeant: "Can you be bartered with, like one of those damned shopkeepers?"
Applicant: "NO! No one can barter with me! My prices are firm, don't even bother offering less!"
Sergeant: "Excellent. Are you a member in good standing of the Psychic Friends Network?"
Applicant: "I knew you were going to ask that. Here's my dossier."
Sergeant: "Let's hear your best Arnold Schwarzenegger voice."
Applicant: "I'll be back."
Sergeant: "Wow, very convincing. Okay, one last thing. Have you ever taken an arrow to the knee?"
Applicant: "Uh, no, never been shot in the knee."
Sergeant: "We're done here. NEXT!"

omg yes i was walking around and i herd one of the gaurds that sound like him.

i was just like
" wait, arnold?"