I don't understand this. When I want to play a mage, I immediately wear the first robes I get and use spells from the get go. If I want to play an archer I use a bow and arrows as soon as I get them. If I want to play a two-handed weapon warrior, I will wear heavy armor and... you get the idea.
And for a lot of people, that is the problem. Essentially, when you begin Skyrim, your name is Bubba. You just magically appear in that cart. You have no previous skills or education. No past (and I'm sorry, but nothing you brew between your ears counts. -If the game does not recognize it, then your are not roleplaying in the game; you are playing Make Believe and using the game as a visual crutch- ). You have no way to =generate= a past that the game recognizes. Things like weapons usage, any of the skills, takes training. If you can do something, you must have had training in it (It's always fun watching some dork who thinks they are good with a knife pick up a bastard sword; they usually hit themselves or wrench an elbow or wrist bad enough for a cast). If you have zero training or knowledge, you shouldn't be able to use a procedure or device properly.
The game allows you to play your "class" from the get go. In fact, it gives you quite a bit of option from the start, since you can choose whatever the hell you want to do. If your characters don't feel unique it's because you play them the same way every time. I think some people have a really hard time restraining themselves from using certain skills, which is kind of funny.
No, it allows you to be everything at once, with no training, no penalties, no work, no effort. You can be wearing full Ebony Plate and swim (unlike , for instance, Daggerfall, where how much weight you could carry and still keep your head above water was governed by your skill in swimming combined with you strength. If it wasn't high enough, you sank. If it was low enough, you went straight to the bottom. And you had a few choices; try and get back above water (not always possible), dump all that heavy gear until you could swim to the surface again (gee, just like it should happen....oops, I was stupid to try this now as the vampire ancient waiting for me--), or drown. Maybe its a generational thing, but I want to feel like I -accomplished something-, not reverse-metagamed the game to hang a lot of 'Well, my character is this and that and the other thing but not in the game, I'm imagining it all and who cares?'.
As for the rest of your post, I understand where you're coming from. I just don't really know how they could script events differently. A scripted event is a scripted event. Perhaps people have better ideas.
One way they could perhaps do it (I don't know if it's feasable with this engine) is a percentage chance of an event triggering. For example, a WWII strategy game I played a lot (and moded) would have a scripted event where Germany would declare war to Poland on September 1st, 1939, about 85% of the time. There was a small chance they would do it later or not do it at all (declare war to France and Britain directly), or there was a chance it would go to war sooner depending on other scripted events (Sudetland, reoccupation of the Rhineland, etc.)
I guess Bethesda could have some script say where "In my time of need" only has a 10% chance of triggering everytime you enter Whiterun. But then again, like someone said, you can just ignore the Alikr and not do the quest now.
But yes, some events I just know are going to happen beforehand, so I get your complaint.
Branching event trees. They have only existed in computers for decades, and are one of the fundamental design concepts that have gone into CRPG's since the first text game. Skyrim fell victim to shooter-itis. Bling over substance. It fell victim to the age of the console it was built for, which put a hard cap on the available ram it had to use. And it fell victim to, for lack of a better term, greed. They wanted to grow the user base by getting a lot of the 'casual gamers'.....meaning those who grab a controller, play until something distracts them, then quits. Which made anything requiring thought, dedication, or the willingness to spend more than 20 minutes at a specific task anathema. Unfortunately, they got a lot of newbies, so it looks like it worked. But the real test is yet to come. Daggerfall still has an active modding community around it 15 years after release (and despite having 1996 graphics). So does Morrowind. Oblivion has one as well, but the interest and activity seems to have fallen off in the last year or so. If Skyrim makes it to the next TES game, I will be very surprised. There simply is no engagement there. No meaning to your character even being there. No danger. No threat. And considering the powers and events at play, there should be some -very- hard decisions for you to make, and serious consequences no matter what you decide. Instead, there's.......nada.