I agree, when a follower dies the only thing I feel is frustrated(stupid AI!), the marriage potentials and the followers lack any kind of depth, you don't get to know them on an intimate level(NOT talking about six!), when Willow was created by LlamaRCA for falloutNV I kept wondering why Beth always fails in this department, I think it's because they feel awkwardly uncomfortable with the whole intimate thing.
I haven't played the Willow mod yet, but I really like the followers in New Vegas. Everyone has a backstory and lots of dialogues to know them better and even a long quest for each of them. No romance and marriage, but that's ok.
I think Obsidian did a really great job here

It's like day and night in comparison to the followers in Skyrim.
But I don't think every RPG needs followers or even romances. If Bethesda feels uncomfortable or the writers lack the skill there's nothing wrong in my eyes in just skipping such things. Still great games without and no need to implement features half-hearted.