The thing is though, if you are designing a game and want to test the mechanics, you don′t approach a casual rpg-style player and ask them to give you feedback on the mechanics, you approach the most devoted and single-minded power-gamer you can find and ask them "try to break this system!" If they can′t, then you have a great mechanic.
TES games of course always fail in this department, so it′s nothing to get too worked up about regarding Skyrim, if you expected a MMO-style balanced system for combat and character development then you must not have played many TES games before.
It's interesting though, there's a whole generation of gamers conditioned to min-max thanks to MMOs, and they get a game like this and don't know what to do.
I am level 46. First character. I mostly leveled smithing though found bars/ore, and didn't go out of my way to use shops (i.e., I never bought out their bars and waited a few days, or by fast traveling to different cities for bars), and I was only able to craft each type of armor only shortly before or shortly after the regular enimies started dropping armor of the same type (up to ebon, naturally). My smithing didn't hit 100 until my late 30s
I only leveled enchanting by putting petty and common soul gems (when I had them) into gems/rings/tiaras that were dropped by enemies, then vending them. Enchanting is currently at 70, with no perks invested.
My alchemy is at 26.
I've completed 80% of the game, including the main quest line, but I can kick the difficulty up to the highest level and still be somewhat challenged. Master is easy.
Personally, I avoided the urge to grind, and found it to be refreshing.